A few good things

I got me a couple of really good friends.

I'm not sure I need much more than that.

I think the more I look at what's going on around me,

the more it is that I appreciate the people that matter.

Thanks for helping me smile at least once a day.

Every day.

It's a mess

Love is a strange and beautiful thing.
Even though it can hurt so much, I still find myself chasing it all around, trying to hold it in my hands, if maybe just for a moment.

I promise that I will find it.

I've been seeing someone without seeing them, I suppose.  I feel for him, I want him, I even crave him.  But I am only his plan B.  I guess that stings.  But I've never met someone like him before, someone I am so attracted to, that is obviously attracted to me in return.  It hurts.  We're being friends right now, as he started seeing someone just before me.  But that tension is there.  The sexting.  The touch on the arm that lingers a little longer than normal.  The compliments. The eye contact... that melts.

Why can't I let him go?
Why can't he let him go?

If he sleeps with me, I will never trust him because he is officially a cheater.  Maybe that's not so true, because I'd hope that the sex would seal the deal in my favour... but the idea will lurk in my mind I'm quite sure.

If we don't sleep together, I'll lose him. 

It's a mess.

Out with him at the club, last night, we ran into a mutual friend.  It was so tough, because the mutual friend knows the other guy my guy is seeing.  Every time I heard that name my face would wince, every time I'd wince my date would wince because I did.

Can I just friend zone this beautiful man?
My hesitation lies within the idea that it's often hard to go from friends to lovers, and maybe worse when it clearly should have been just lovers from the get go.

One & Only

You've been on my mind
I grow fonder every day,
Lose myself in time
Just thinking of your face
God only knows
Why it's taking me so long
To let my doubts go
You're the only one that I want

I don't know why I'm scared, I've been here before
Every feeling, every word, I've imagined it all,
You never know if you never try
To forgive your past and simply be mine

I dare you to let me be your, your one and only
Promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms
So come on and give me the chance
To prove that I'm the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts

I've been on your mind
You hang on every word I say, lose yourself in time
At the mention of my name,
Will I ever know how it feels to hold you close?
And have you tell me whichever road I choose you'll go

I don't know why I'm scared 'cause I've been here before
Every feeling every word, I've imagined it all,
You never know if you never tried
To forgive your past and simply be mine

I dare you to let me be your, your one and only
I promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms
So come on and give me the chance
To prove that I'm the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts

I know it ain't easy
Giving up your heart
I know it ain't easy
Giving up your heart

(Nobody's perfect, trust me I've learnt it)
I know it ain't easy, giving up your heart
(Nobody's perfect, trust me I've learnt it)
I know it ain't easy, giving up your heart

I know it ain't easy
Giving up your heart

So I dare you to let me be your, your one and only
I promise I'm worthy to hold in your arms
So come on and give me the chance
To prove I'm the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts
Come on and give me a chance
To prove that I'm the one who can
Walk that mile until the end starts.
-Adele